By Yihan
2nd Draft“I’ve Good News!”
No reply.
“Dr Armstrong, yer’there?”
On his desk, a note read: “Take care of Tasha, Ollie and Milson.”
There’s a million-dollar cheque for them.
"Better tell Armstrong about this," he remarked.
The assistant walked to the surgical instruments.
Then running out of the room in tears,
The door closed peacefully behind him.
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55 Words
1st Draft
“I’ve Good News!”The air was still.
“Dr Armstrong, yer’there?”
No reply.
On his desk, a note read:
“Take care of Tasha, Ollie and Milson.”
There’s a three-million-dollar cheque for the three children.
Darrell walked near the surgical instruments.
And saw it.
Running out of the room in tears,
The door closed peacefully behind him.
____________________________________________________
55 Words
Image Courtesy of: iStockPhoto
3 comments:
The only change I'd make is "near the surgical instruments." Not sure how proximity relates to the rest. Relationship between Darrell and Armstrong should be established. Does Darrell cash the cheque and keep it?
Noted. Will change it.
Just did. Hope it sounds better.
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